I am an Introvert! Believe it or Believe it!

IntrovertsWayAt times, somebody would ask me to describe my self, and I would say that “I am a jack of all trades, master of none, and a misunderstood introvert”; these are the words you would see even on my twitter page. And I guess, now is the right time to explain why I describe myself as such, or at least the “misunderstood introvert” part.
To start my long story, being a psychology minor requires a lot of understanding and describing yourself in class, and as I always do, I describe myself as an introvert who prefers to be alone rather than with the crowd – that is how I understand myself. But 9.5 out of 10 instances of me describing myself as such, my classmates, especially my friends babble violent reactions saying that I am not an introvert (as if they know myself better than I do). They argue that I am not an introvert because I am good at socializing, I am cheerful, and that I am outgoing; in fact, you might think that I am an extrovert. They tend to depict as if an introvert is somebody who is shy, blue, and not capable of leaving the house. However, to use Sophia Dembling’s words, they don’t get it.
My classmates, and other people, don’t get it because they often correlate introversion with shyness, when in fact, these are two entirely different things. Shyness is a behavior exhibiting inhibition, tenseness, and being uncomfortable in social situations. While, introversion is a motivation of having a weak desire to be with other people. We, introverts, just prefer being alone – and let me tell you, there is a difference between being alone and being lonely. There are people surrounded by people but still feel lonely, and there are people who are alone, there, just enjoying their aloneness, just being themselves, not feeling lonely. The same holds true for introverts like us, we could be alone, but there we are enjoying the aloneness we have. Also, it’s true that we are often quiet, but that doesn’t mean we have nothing to say, we just don’t prefer taking the spotlight.
lBasically, introversion, according to Carl Jung, is when your psychic energy flows inward, while extroversion is when your psychic energy flows outward. I know, it so hard to understand this idea of energy-in/energy-out by Jung, but I embrace it, because I feel comfortable with it. I feel that it relates to how I really feel. I understand what he is trying to say. It’s not true that we introverts could not socialize or talk to other people, we could, in fact, we could really be good at it. But at the end of the day, it’s like that we drained all our energy from these activities, and the way to replenish it is to sit back, relax and withdraw for a moment from the crowd. Most of my friends don’t get it, maybe because they are extroverts, and they get more energy from socializing.
I started learning about introversion when I thought of myself as somebody who is different from others, but as I learned, and learned some more, I understood that I am like this because this is who I really am, an introvert. I am not shy, snob, or a party-pooper; I am just who I am, somebody enjoying some quiet time. Actually, the first book which taught me a lot about understanding the “misunderstood introvert” part of my self is Sophia Dembling’s. Her book The Introvert’s Way: Living a Quiet Life in a Noisy World taught me a lot – most of the ideas in this post is from there as a matter of fact. It taught me that it is not my problem to be misunderstood, it is those who see me. She also taught me that staying home isn’t bad, in fact, it is good, it is doing something. That my presence is a gift, not a requirement, that there are boring people and I don’t need to listen to all of them, saying no to parties and other events is a kindness, I want who I want, and being quiet doesn’t mean I have nothing to say. Finally, I now understand that I am who I am and I know myself better than anyone else.
I know, some people could not understand what I am saying, but I also know that there are others who could relate. I am not here to say that introverts are better and special. I am just here to stand up and fight (quietly) for all those misunderstood introverts out there, for the others to understand who we really are, and for all of the world to know that introverts have a voice, in fact, many voices in an extroverted dominated society.
Introverts Unite!

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